By RUNNER

& STEAMER PACKET

                                                                                                                             Government House,

                                                                                                                                           Kaiserville,

                                                                                                                                Lumbago Junction.

Lt Col j plunkett-brown

officer commanding the west african

colonial expeditionary and cartography party

(wace cafe)

camp no 5.

Lumbago river

Dear plunkett-brown,

      How nice to hear from you so soon, I expected you to be busy settling in for a while; you must be one of the few cartographic parties that actually need to build such sturdy accommodation.   I believe the fukarwi you are referring to are some renegades that ran off and joined that ruga ruga chap who is in the area.  you will be pleased to know that bugga-ul has had them proscribed so they are dead meat (if you get my drift), if they show any part of their bodies around here.   As to crossing the great elephant mountains I have little control because these are the ancient hunting grounds of the fukarwi since time immemorial.  However, have told bugga-ul of your displeasure and he has assured me that no British person will be harmed.  he was amused by your term subjects as many of the tribes there pay tribute to him,  so he believes you were using the term in a loose sense.

      By the way one of bugga-ul‘s headmen,

                   RESPECTFULLY

                cOLONEL vON sTROMP

         gOVERNOR GENERAL (sELF PROCLAIMED)

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